Take a gun called hate, Up against your heart...

I want you so bad...

This is just going to be a short one as the battery's dying. I've been out at Bury Bowl all evening with everyone from cadets, and Claire for a short time. It was a really good laugh, shame I was driving cause I would have liked to have got a lil' tipsy. Oh well still smiling and got to run Em home... Of on my second part of the my climbing course tomorrow which hopefully should be good. Then I'm canoing Saturday, possibly in the snow!!! Would be pretty cool don't you think?

Anyway I'm going to probably text someone and promptly fall asleep.

Night World.

You don't notice because the music's too loud...

Makes you realize, that there isn't always another day... This was said to me in a text just a few minutes ago, while I was sitting here in bed. Sadly he's correct... In memory

I've had a really nice weekend, was back at my second (or third) home, Thorpe Woodlands to help run a junior AT camp. All though cold, it was still a good crack. Got to have a laugh with the staff and a chance to catch up with Bart-man. I don't want to write too much about it, just going to show off some pictures. I love the feel of the place, even in the harshness of the frost and chill you find warmth and vitality in even the smallest places as well as in the people you work with. It brings the best out in good people. Cant wait till the summer.


Post dedicated to Kristy and all the other T.W.A.T.S

There's a truth in your eye...

Well I'm sitting on claires sofa, watching friends and fiddling on her laptop. Unfortunately I'm sitting on my own... Shes down the road at ringing, and while I was invited I thought I might take the time and just relax and watch some good ol' Friday night tv...

Unfinished?

Focused on today...

Well the past 24 hours have been... strange i guess is the term...

And now weeks later I can't remember what the hell was stange...

Suppose it stands to reason...

I haven’t blogged for a while, not really sure why, perhaps it's of too much work, busy with other things, or just I’ve just not been in the mood. I'm sitting in the computer room at school again, I feel quite ill, maybe more fatigued than ill... I'm still in quite a bad mood since this morning; it really did thoroughly piss me off. Today although it hasn't dragged it’s been slow, just moped on like the dreary weather we've got today. I have a test next lesson that I really don't feel like attempting, not due to the fact I will fail, but I can't even keep my eyes focused on a specific point for more than 10 seconds. I want to go home and sit with some music on and just mull everything over. I have so many things I could be doing but I just don't feel like them, I’ve finally decided I’m going to do chemistry at uni what ever, just need to find six uni's that I can get in with my predicted grades. Finally going for this decision is mainly down to my mother, Sunday night we we're talking about what I was going to do and she was telling me how unmotivated and undirected I’d become. "You used to be so motivated, and now in the last few months you've just lost your drive". She's right though I have lost my enthusiasm and 'get-up-and-go', why? I don't know, as I got to the end of last year I got to the point of always doing as little as I needed and now this year it’s even worse, I want to do well but I have to many other distractions and things to occupy my time... It's not Claire, well I’d hope its not, I do spend a lot of my spare time with her and I’m doing things with her when I know I should be working. But cadets take a lot of my time and just life at home doesn't help.... I'm just making excuses now, I really have got to pull my finger out, I hope now I know what course I’m doing I can sort that out quickly and get on with improving my grades.